I cockslap morals
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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