My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
