Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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