FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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