Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
