if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
