WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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