I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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