I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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