this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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