I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
