May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
vagina is talking i cant
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
