I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
