The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My feet surprised me
There's even glitter on my cock...
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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