it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
