I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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