Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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