I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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