Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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