At least make sure they are 18
Why
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
