just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize