just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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