But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
