I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
