Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
There r osticjed everywhere
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
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