We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
We had to coat check the pizza.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
