The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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