Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize