Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he fucked my hip out of place.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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