it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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