Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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