Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
