I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Less talking, more tequila
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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