GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
