She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize