I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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