i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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