Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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