You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
