Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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