did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Randomize
