sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
