what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
