guys are not supposed to queef...right?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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