when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
