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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Why does Corona taste like a burp?

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast

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• (425): View more from Washington

  THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.

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• (415): View more from California

  I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night

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