Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
