Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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