I'm laying in your front yard are you home
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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