i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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