Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
