I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
In America we eat man semen.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
