I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
